Gombeen #5: Dermot Desmond

In #rabble5, Gombeen, Humour, Illustration, Politics, Print Edition by rabble3 Comments

Illustration Redmonk

The dastardly dirty Dermot Desmond will be receiving the outstanding contribution to Ireland award out in his lair: the IFSC.

Out there among the clusterfucks of wholesale financial “products”, Desmond broods over his €1.35 billion fortune and laughs in the face of the now deceased “Robin Hood Tax” which Consigliere Noonan sorted out recently, ensuring speculative behaviour on the markets will not be be reasonably taxed.. No! That cold, hard cash has to come from Household Charges, Water Taxes and Civil Service Pensions.

The award will no doubt emulate just another notch in this man’s ethically troubled belt: Citibank, Pricewaterhouse Coopers, Aer Rianta… then things get topical. A debut in the Glackin report preceded several guest appearances in the Moriarty Tribunal, followed by a cameo in the Flood Tribunal. Some hairy deals and questionable “loans” with the Haughey family, including paying for Charles’ yacht to be refurbished to the tune of £75,000, began to make Desmond look like the kind of alumnus Citibank would be proud of. With many different offshore bank accounts, Desmond has racked up an intriguing paper trail to follow the abortion that was the Johnston Mooney and O’Brien land deal. This award certifies our Desmond as dancing in the big leagues of corporate culture. Godspeed you dirt merchant!

It’s good to know that the standards of the IFSC are as low as one would expect…

Comments

  1. Wish this thing would hurry up with a dislike button, I really do.

  2. Desmond: brilliant investor, great Celtic supporter. Kept the club prudent but ambitious while Rangers disappeared up their own bigoted posteriors in a tax dodging debt bubble. Love the guy. You lot can give a baccio to my culo.

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